Don't short yourself

I had a long talk with Gina this morning. I am really enjoying my conversations with her. Anyway, of course we talked about Landmark and our experience and she asked me if there was anything that I thought she didn't get from Landmark and my answer was no. I was thrilled with everything she got on just that Friday. Seriously, I would have been completely happy if it just ended there, but as we know, this wasn't about me. Of course, I am glad it went beyond that because she obviously got complete with her mom, which was huge.

It's been really interesting watching people go through Landmark. Being the judgemental person that I am...or excuse me...was (ha!), I of course, like any human being, would hope that the person going into it would get what I think they should get. I am probably wrong for that, but I am just being honest.

Jamie was the one that got me to do Landmark...she recognized the things I secretly wanted her to recognize for herself because I knew it would make her excel as a person. She has always been a great lady, but man, she was completely different-in a great way- when completing the forum. Therefore, my expectation of Landmark only heightened in regards to making people dig deep inside themselves, even if it may sting a little to realize the things that will better them. If you don't do that, I feel like it's a waste of time. You need to go in with an open mind even if you are blindsided because to be honest, that is what will make you complete.

I went into Landmark hoping it would solve my weight problem, confidence and communication, but was unsure how it would do those things for me. Little did I know that I would actually find the cause of my issues. I feel like I was able to get down to where my faults were and have openly admitted, but didn't realize until the forum, that I hated myself which made me judgemental (about all of the things I am insecure about) of other people. I also realized that because of my self hatred, I was not able to be intimate with my friends or family. I realized that even though I am insecure, I am self absorbed. These are all things I am still working through. Landmark wasn't a quick fix, it's more about perspective and realizations and giving you the tools to work through them.

If you go into Landmark focused on one thing, then that one thing is going to be what your entire experience is about. All you are doing is shorting yourself. Be open, it will lead you to places you have never even imagined - good and bad. I can't wait to go to the advanced course to dive deeper into what makes me the way that I am. I know it's going to hurt a lot, but man, it's going to be refreshing at the same time.